vada pav ya burger

A good vada is a fusion of nature's best ... potatoes, green chillies, garlic, secret spices and some honest human sweat. It's deep fried on high heat and extremely skillfuly placed in an exotic form of bread called the pav. The pav itself is delicately greased with a green chutney made of secret herbs grown on railway tracks (using nature's finest manure).
The burger is a piece of meat in a slice of bun with some icky white stuff and some red stuff and some mustard stuff and some random leaves. A good burger is one that doesn't fit into your mouth as easily as your shoe.
Vada pav is 100 per cent vegetarian except for some flies that may be stuck to the green chutney. These flies are traditionally good digestives. The burger in its purest form moos. You have vegetarian burgers but that's like fully dressed Mallika Sherawat, not quite the real thing.
Burgers are best washed down with Cola (they don't pay me enough to mention brands here). Vada pav can be washed down with anything including Mumbai's choicest germs.
Burgers are responsible for America's biggest problem -- over eating. Vada pav keeps half of Mumbai from starving.